And my surprise reflected how unusual this situation is. Middle aged men frequently date women younger than themselves. Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones have an age difference of 25 years.
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- dating ex heroin addict;
- low expectations dating;
- dating immediately after separation?
I've seen this play out repeatedly in my own life. Most of the fifty-something men I know have, at some point, been involved with women in their thirties.
And the relationships go one of two ways. Either they end in heartbreak, because the younger woman wants babies and the man can't bear the thought of starting over, or they stay together, and the man eventually becomes a father again in midlife. So why do so many older men hook up with younger woman?
Well, the obvious answer is 'because they can'. But what makes young women so attractive to older men?
Year-Old Women and Year-Old Guys | HuffPost
I mean, sure, their bodies are firmer, but why is this so fantastically important? Older men don't have a great deal in common with younger women, and it's an easy option in the long term.
It can be enormously costly to start a new family in midlife, both emotionally and financially. Well, perhaps the answer is fear. For a man, an older partner is a constant reminder of his own age. He cannot pretend he's still thirty when he's waking up next to a fifty-year-old woman.
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A younger partner is life-affirming. She helps to stave off his own fear of aging and mortality.
nenosealotu.ml If a man can wake up next to a woman a decade or two younger, he can convince himself that he is still young. At first I ignored it because, being in such close quarters, I was sure one of the guys had just bumped my arm. But the nudging persisted until I turned to the tall, handsome young man standing next to me. When we made eye contact, he said, quietly, without any hint of sarcasm or malice or innuendo: How does that make you feel?
In other words, how did it make me feel that his friend was asking where the ladies were while I, obviously a female, stood among them?
How did it feel that his friend had not counted me as a viable, desirable woman? First, how I see myself isn't necessarily how others see me. Most of us, even as we age, still feel young. And then, seemingly suddenly, our outsides and insides no longer match, like one of those unexceptional movies in which the personality of a year-old girl invades her mother's body.
So, no matter how much Botox you inject or how many Pilates classes you attend, you're still the age you are and everyone else can see that. Even if you look good. Even if you look great.
You're still a year-old woman to a year-old guy. Second, I remembered how I felt at their age about people my age. Even if they weren't.
The Sydney Morning Herald
A college professor of mine had a very beautiful, sexy wife I only realize now who was probably no older than 35 but, to my college-aged self, she was ancient. The same follows for the elevator guy and me. And just as my youthful opinion of the professor's wife had no bearing on her life or self-image, nor does the drunken guy's have any on mine. I'm old to him and that's just fine. Third, I'm happy to be in this phase of life. Youth may be wasted on the young but it also belongs to them in both its splendor and struggle.